Saturday, August 1, 2009

Remember when we could party til the breaka-breaka? I 29 with a one year old? Already? How the hay did that happen?

Last weekend was my gal Denise's Bachelorette party in NYC. It was super fun, and I've paid for all that fun this all last week with a hacking, feverish, part bed-ridden, loogie spitting bronchial infection. Gorgeous, right? It seriously seems like minutes ago that I was able to hang with the single ladies, to stay up all night and party with the best of them, and to be able to just get up and go 3 hours after we closed the bar. Have I really become and old frumpy mama who is more apt to change a diaper then down a martini? Can't be, impossible. Us Diva's never loose our fabulousness and always are up for another round of Bellini's. But alas, as I look at the pics from the past weekend, I see a chick who's sitting while the other's are dancing, who's a pro at blowing up the blow up doll only because she's had practice at her fair share of pool toys this summer, and who's breasts have truly seen perkier days. God Damnit!! How the hell did this happen?

Notice I am not dancing in this pic....i am sitting in the booth taking the pic....(sigh)

Heather, you must agree....we were two hot single ladies at some point in our lives, right? Remember that pink mini and playboy shirt you wore to my 24th party? Yeah....the party where I passed out on the living room floor wearing a too short for comfort skirt and limited undergarments.....yeah that one.

Wait a tic....Is that considered hot? Sheesh.....

But who's to say that a demure lady on the sides isn't as sassy and sexy as the one's on the dance floor? I was the one taking it all in and observing the totally outrageous plastic Ho's that took the seats next to us. Ah.....drama. And really, when I look back on those Let-em-run-wild days....they really were not so fabu. I mean...take the flash back from above.'s more embarrassing than sexy. I mean, the getting-trashed-and-falling-all-over-yourself-and-showing-your-naughty-bits-to-others-while-driving-by-on-the-freeway-while-telling-your-friends-how-much-you-love-them-as-they-hold-your-hair-back-look is so early twenties.

And guess what moms, I was still able to hang with the single ladies! I stayed with them through the night, ending at 3 in the morning eating mozzarella sticks in a 24 hour diner. I stuck it out! It's probably all the practice I had from a year of comforting a teething child at 2 am. I'm kinda used to the lack of sleep thing.
Yeah, so what if i wasn't as vivacious as them and didn't dance as many dances and wasn't as outgoing with the boys and sat demurely and drank my vodka shot in 4 mini shots. I can still say that I Friggin took a vodka shot! Go Mom!!! That's what H would say if he could....yeah I know he'd be proud. And thanks to my fellow party ladies....I found out that I am one helluva Beer Pong player. Could I have figured that out playing flash cards with H? I think not!

It really did feel great to get out and kinda have a mom's weekend off with the girls.....but I'll tell you something...It felt INCREDIBLE when Sonny and H came up to meet us on that Sunday. My girls had never seen him and they were just gushing. I'm the only one of my college friends that has a baby, and as much as I would have liked to be able to keep up a little more with them, I think that there's a part of them that would like to have a little H-man in their lives. So I may not be able to party like a rock star....but I can still hang....even if its a little lower and a little slower.... I'm still there, Champagne in hand!

Ok...Well you have to love this pic with Hunter and all the Ladies...look at that huge smile on his face!
Oh and Beer's all about the arc....just a note

Congrats on non-singledom Denise!


  1. I have no idea what you're talking about...

    Martinis and I never got along well and I keep trying to make us get along. No dice.

    H is such a lady's man!


  2. Nice language. Otherwise hilarious story! :-)


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