Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Mrs. Organization...Who me?

Being cooped up because of the rain last week got me thinking... This Stay-At-Home-Mom (SAHM) thing is still fairly new to me. I've been at it for 10 months as of this week and it's a major adjustment. I was having trouble explaining to Hubby my need for adult conversation vs. the "This is a ball. This is a blue ball. NO! Don't touch that!" dialogue with Will day in and day out. While Will and I were stuck inside all last week because of our epic rainfall in SoCal, I was also stuck inside to dwell, obsess, and stress about my inner dialogue.

I was bored. Not because I was lacking chores and activities to do, but from lack of stimulation. By the time Saturday came I was done. My brain felt like mush and I was upset about it. Saturday is usually a nice day to get out, go see my friends or family for lunch while Hubby is at work. It's the one day I can really do this since everyone I know has a 9-5 job. Well, no one wanted to come out and play with me on Saturday. And talking on the phone, while it's a relatively quick fix for the mundane, is just not the same as face to face conversation. Hubby came home to a messy kid and a cranky wife. I think the most frustrating part of it was that I didn't know how to fix my problem.

I have been doing lots of research into a gym class for Will and I to attend once a week or so. The trouble with this is the expense - again back to our pitiful budget. Will seemed to enjoy the freebie classes we've been to, but I just can't justify $400+ for a once a week class. If they had a free play session, or a separate room where you can take your kid to let them run around and interact in addition to the organized class, I'd be down with that, but so far that's not the case. (If you have any info on a place that has these features, by all means, tell me more!) I was thinking that this would be good stimulation for him, as well as me, since there would be other moms (or sometimes dads) to chat with, even if it is for 30-45 minutes once a week. It's better than nothing!

Then, yesterday, I was talking it out with Hubby as we took Will for a walk. He pointed out that I have always been good about time management and since Will was born it's been more of a struggle for me. I had never thought about that! But that's totally right on the money, too. I'm sure that's part of my pent up frustration with, I guess myself.

Of course there's the whole "no job" change too. It's been almost a year since I've worked. That is a huge adjustment itself and probably why this is a bit harder. I was used to being on the phone all day, talking to my coworkers, making schedules, arranging deliveries, fixing problems, calculating costs and yardages, and bookkeeping. Now the extent of my problem solving is "Will is crying. How do I fix it? Oh, maybe change him out of the 5 pounds of crap that's in his diaper...". Not quite rocket science...

So I suppose I have made a bit of a revelation in all of this. Will and I need to get out more. Not just to go run errands and pick up groceries, but to putz around. I am pretty good at getting out for a walk, but I need to vary up our destinations. And sadly, unless we move to New Jersey to become Lani's next door neighbor, maybe I find another SAHM to putz around with once in a while. I have enough friends to keep up with, so this is a struggle for me, but it might be good to help keep my brain from becoming mush.

If you're a SAHM, what do you do to keep your sanity? Stimulate your adult brain? How do you find a balance for yourself?


  1. Well I'm definitely not a SAHM but getting out more definitely sounds like it will work. When I'm leaving in the morning for work sometimes, I see a line of mommies jogging with their strollers around the park. I can imagine they ran into the same SAHM Syndrome as you're discussing. Taking the laptop and hanging out at Starbucks is always a nice way to break the day apart as well.

  2. Oh, Thanks James! That's a great idea!


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